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NC State Tailgate Wrap-Up:

            - Lot 1, College Park, MD

Tailgate Quote: 

“Losers take breaks, PEE ON YOURSELF!!!”

                                    -J (or some Dad from an after school special, I’m really not sure!)

Overall:

Well I have good news and bad news.  The bad news obviously is that this recap has taken me forever to get out.  The reason for this was that I had a HUGE presentation I had to do for work, so most if not all of my free time this week was devoted to not making an ass out of myself in front of 50 people (the jury’s still out on that one!).  But as of about 11:00 am this Thursday I am finished and I feel like a brand new man.  In fact I’m down right giddy.  In a way I feel kind of drunk.  Not the alcohol kind of drunk where I repeat stories and omit key words in sentences, but the kind of drunk where I can pound out about 30 J jokes in one sitting!

And this is of course without stopping to take in the fact that it’s not even Halloween and WE’RE GOING BOWLING!!  There really isn’t too much not to be happy about at the moment.  But enough of all that, this past Saturday was of course the D7 Annual Pumpkin Carving Championship.  Can you believe we’ve done 4 of them already?  Who would have ever thought we’d outlast the XFL, oh yeah, I guess everyone would have.  (Maybe in a parallel universe sort of way “He Hate Me” was the XFL’s “Fur is Murder”).  Oh I miss that stupid league.  Anyway, this year saw the coveted Carving Knife Trophy leave Calvert County (barely) for the first time since 2005 when I famously invented and won the competition all in one year. 

But we’ll get more into the pumpkins later.  This tailgate was also unique in several other ways.  For example, this past week was perhaps the world’s first indoor, yet outdoor, game of flip cup ever.  I’ve seen a lot in my life, but I haven’t seen Flip Cup played in a tent before.  And as always I use the term “play” lightly, the word actually gives off an aura of fun like “let’s go play outside” or in J’s case “My wife isn’t here because she is off ‘playing’ soccer.” (that’s 1).  For those who don’t know Soccer is what Mary refers to her secret lover as, I hate having to spell out jokes but we’re trying to increase readership here people!  But back to my point, flip cup in late October has nothing to do with fun.  Especially for the first ever D7 flip cup draft.  Now I know how those 8 year old beauty pageant girls feel.  Just a piece of meat living out their Cougar Mom’s deranged fantasy, in this case J and Jen were the mothers and we were the kids who no matter how hard we tried, just couldn’t nail the curtsy just so.   Not to get off subject but keep in mind I’m on a high here, the name of my Middle Schools Mascot was the Cherry Hill Cougars.   Looking back, I can’t help but chuckle at that name now.  I wonder if they’ve changed their football helmets to have a tube of lipstick and a halter top on them. 

Back to the tailgate this weekend saw our first 3:30 start since I think Delaware, and it was a nice change.  I for one got to spend the night at my in-laws which meant I didn’t have to leave the house until 9:00 am which when you have a 10 month old is as close to sleeping in as you are going to get.  We also had the return of hotdogs and cheeseburgers for the first time in forever, it had been a while since I had a meal other than breakfast at a tailgate.  The late start time also allowed some of the more tardy D7 members to show up at a decent tailgating hour.   I think Surin and B Lee walked up well before 10:00 am, which is a time they don’t usually beat for the noon games.  This tailgate due to the convenience of said start time was also the debut of April.  Born too late for the 2007 season, but not late enough to miss the Emerald Bowl disaster, this was Aprils first experience in lot 1.  Overall I thought she did pretty well, she laughed, she cried, which is about on par with everyone else’s experience each week.  Though she had a great time, due to the impending cold weather, that will probably be it for April and the 2008 Maryland Tailgating Season.

And of course it would be pretty lame of me to omit that fact that this NC State game had the most botched D7 Forecast in the history of the website.  Look I know I’m not perfect, and I know no one expects me to be, but I am really disturbed by what happened.  It would be one thing if my gut was torn and I just flipped a coin, but I had so much confidence in this particular forecast that it has shaken my very faith in myself.  As you can see I’m still so shocked that I haven’t done the VT forecast yet.  But I just have to pick myself up and get right back on that horse. 

Anyway before I make more of an ass of myself than I already have (8 year old pageant girls, that’s the best I could come up with?!!?!) we’d better move on.  In fact I’m still 29 J jokes sort of my goal, well we’ll say 28, comparing him to a Cougar was sort of a joke.

Tailgate Highlights:

Putting the canopy over the flip cup table was a great idea.  Putting the side panel up to block the wind and rain was what took that great idea and turned it into the Tailgate Highlight.  That was pure genius.  Stop and think what we would have done without that thing?  I don’t think we would have been able to play in all honesty. 

Tailgate Lowlights:

This is controversial and I know I’ll get crap for this, but the lowlight of the tailgate was the name game.  Really Bob, that’s your lowlight?   Many people had a rip roaring time playing the Name game.”  I know, I know, but here was the problem.   I played the name game for probably 45 minutes and in those 45 minutes I may have said 9 names….maybe?  The rest of the time me, Brian Lee, Snively, and J stood there watching the names bounce back and forth between the two Leavitts as Chris was reacting to each “um” or stutter as if beer was going to come out of his nose, and while Mr. Leavitt faked laughing each time a name came to him so that he could buy 10 free seconds before he pretended to drink his beer.  Ok looking back I guess it was pretty entertaining, but would it kill you guys to have an S come to you and say Steve Blake instead of Sammy Sosa, Sammy Stewart, Steve Sax, or any other hundred SS names!  I swear there was one point where I left the tent, got a hot dog, walked over and got ketchup, called Kristin to see if they found the beltway okay, finished my hot dog, walked back into the tent and didn’t miss a single turn! 

Oh yeah, and whoever brought the skinny bottom flip cups?  What the hell was that?  It’s like playing baseball and at the all star break someone deciding we were going to start using whiffle balls from now on?  Where did that come from? 

Live from College Park Downs:

Don’t worry, on November 4^th we WILL pass the slot referendum and then our horse racing industry will be saved!                

LRC:

We were this close (imagine my fingers about an inch apart) to breaking out LRC, but once again no LRC game was played.  This is really starting to hurt our bottom line!

Punt, Pass, and Kick:

We had some interesting weather for the PPK.  The winds were pretty stiff, but at the same time at this point in the tailgate we were still dry.  Otherwise I could only imagine how we would have done trying to place kick with sneakers on a wet parking lot.  I’m guessing there would have been incidents!   Anyway this week saw our largest participation in PPK and though there were times in the past where I thought if only this or this would have happened I could have won this thing, today was not one of those days.  I didn’t have a prayer.  I think what’s happened is that everyone has kind of figured out the place kicking, and that used to be where I picked up some ground. 

Now the bad news here is that because we did PPK first, that sheet on the note pad was on top.  As such when the rains finally did arrive, that sheet took the brunt of the moisture.  In fact it was pretty much ineligible, but the good news is, that like a good solider, that top sheet absorbed the impact of the weather and allowed the sheets behind it to survive.  I like to think that all my sheets are equally special to me but lets face it, if I had to lose my PPK notes or my flip cup notes, which ones loss would create more of an outrage?

Though all evidence has been lost from this event, I’m pretty certain J won with a total of 43 spots.  I don’t know about you all, but this is starting to get old.  Maybe next tailgate, we’ll say we are going to play PPK make J walk out to the middle of the parking lot, and then we’ll all jump him.  That could be a new event.  Hey I could even get a trophy with a metallic fist on top and keep notes. 

I can see the recap now.  This week in the “Kick the Crap Out of J” competition, Justin lead the way with 25 blows before J eventually escaped.  Chris was right behind with 21.  When reached for comment Justin had this to say about his victory:  “Well it was a tough fight, no not between J and I but holding off Chris was tough.  I was worried that keeping that roll of quarters in my hand was going to slow me down, but luckily I was still able to land many blows before the competition ended.  You have to hand it to Chris though, he’s a great competitor and working over J’s kidney’s like he did was pure genius.”. 

Coffin Corner:

The more we play Coffin Corner, the more respect I have for Travis Baltz.  This is not an easy game, and the 30mph gusts certainly don’t make it any easier.  When Surin landed his punt at the 15 yard line, it never occurred to me for one second that it would easily be the best punt.  I did give it a go with what was almost the greats punt in CC history, but alas it was a touch back, the two most evil words in the CC language. 

I also found it interesting that not one person was able to run down field to down a punt.  I think we may need to adjust the rules on this.  In the real world the guys running downfield don’t start even with the punter, and they also can start moving once the ball is snapped giving them an extra 3 seconds or so to get into position. 

Pumpkin Carving Contest:

Here we are back for the 4^th Annual D7 Pumpkin Carving Contest.  I must say I’m very proud that this event has made it four years.  I am also proud of the fact that it is still evolving, as you all know this year we featured ballots so that many people could have a say in the outcome.  I think this idea worked, but we did have a problem in that we had to do the voting in about 5 minutes.  The idea was to have the pumpkins out on display and whatever people stopped by and commented on them, we’d ask them to vote.  I think this would have been a great idea, however, when I thought it up, I didn’t really account for the torrential down pours.  Since the ballots were paper, and the voting box was cardboard, we’ll I don’t think I really need to spell it out for you.  But the point is we are evolving.

This years prize was also a nice white Maryland Long Sleeve T-shirt, which for the first time ever was not purchased by either Chris or myself.  [On a side note here, I should relay this story, after all I never fail to point out the short comings of everyone else so it’s only fair for me to expose myself on this one.  Chris bought a Maryland hat at Wal-Mart to contribute to this years prize pool.  Well when he gave it to me, I guess I didn’t really understand what was going on.  I was thinking to myself “Why did Chris buy me a Maryland hat?”.  But again, Chris is the type of person that would do something randomly nice for someone so I just took it in stride, after all I really liked the hat, however not until the Wake Forest game when I wore it to the tailgate and Chris said “Why are you wearing the Pumpkin Carving Prize?” did the light bulb in my head finally go off.  I’m an idiot, but I’m also an idiot with a new hat, so that kind softens the blow].

Anyway we had 5 entries this year.  B Lee worked on a pumpkin, but I was told there was some sort of incident, apparently it collapsed upon itself, though I admit I only caught bits and pieces of the conversation, and he could have actually been talking about a large supernova star he had on his kitchen table.  (Ladies and Gentleman there is your Dennis Miller obscure forced reference for the week…Thank you, Thank you, I appreciate the kisses).  Anyway it appears participation took a dive this year due to the several exams and other important issues.  Hopefully next year we can be back in the 8-10 entry range, though I admit, only having to do 5 pumpkin recaps is kind of nice.

Anyway, lets get into this:

Your 2008 D7 Pumpkin Carving Contest Winner- J!  J has been a loyal pumpkin participant since the contests inception, and much like a homely girl on Prom night, J has known the sting of putting himself out there, only to see someone else walk away with the crown, but not this year.  This year J sold himself, and his pumpkin, to the Dark Side and went with the Darth Vader carving.  Hmmm, I think it says a lot about our society that Jesus doesn’t win first place last year, but people went nuts for the Lord of the Sith!  I fear for our generation.  Anyway congratulations J, and I must say seeing J win the contest was a personal highlight for me.  I know we all want to win, but seeing the general overall happiness on J’s face makes me feel as thought he Pumpkin Carving Contest has really meant something over these past few years.

2008 Runner Up- This years’ runner up was Deb.  Deb who’s new to the Pumpkin Carving contest certainly made a bang in her debut, in fact she came within one vote of being the first rookie to ever win, a feat that hasn’t happened since a young knife wielder named Bob W took the contest by storm in 2005, of course we were all rookies then.  Deb also had the extra advantage of being from Calvert County, which as we all know is the Pumpkin Carving Capital of the World.  Having a Calvert Countian enter a pumpkin carving contest is a lot like having someone from Indiana in a corn shucking contest (Notice I did NOT say someone from Indiana and Name game, I’m not looking in any particular direction, just throwing that out there).  Anyway, Deb’s snowman like entry was well done and obviously took home a large chunk of the votes.

3^rd Place- Once again I am sitting here doing a Pumpkin Carving Contest and once again I’m  putting myself in third place.  For some this would be upsetting, but not for this guy!  I’m like the skinny little guy in a ball room brawl, all I have to survive by is my wits.  I have got to be as creative and clever as possible to make up for my general lack of artistic ability and by coming in third every year, I think I’ve managed to do just that.  Heck I lucked out in year one by winning so whatever I do from now on, the pressure is off. 

Remaining Pumpkins-  Surin’s Terrapin was a well carved Pumpkin, I’m not sure why it didn’t do better, maybe because Surin wasn’t at the voting and couldn’t drop little hints to people as they were writing stuff down like “Wow look at that turtle, it’s so lifelike.”.  Of course like a race horse who shows promise in a lower level race Surin’s pumpkin was the only one “Claimed” at the end of the night.  I think J’s boss Dave too it home, either to keep it there or to take into work.  He actually probably dropped it over the edge of some overpass on the beltway, but for happy endings sake we’ll say it currently resides at the Montgomery County Agricultural Service Center. 

And then we have Chris- I can’t be too hard on Chris.  If he lived in Maryland had time to carve and still came up with what he’s blessed us with in the past, then perhaps maybe I could really lay into him.  But I’m not sure what I would be able to carve in 10 minutes before the tailgate, so I’ve got to hand it to him for at least participating every year.  Maybe one day if he is ever back in the area he can really show us what he is capable of doing when he has the time and resources.  Until then Fur is Murder will take it’s place next to the drinking pumpkin, and Fudgey the Whale in the annals of D7 history.  Hey for what it’s worth everyone of us can probably name every pumpkin Chris ever carved, so that’s got to be worth something. 

So there it is.  A little wet, okay a lot wet, but we got through it.  5 Entries was a little light, but I think we’ll be back next year strong.  Especially if some of these guys would ever finish their grad school work!

Pumpkin Carving Facts:

The contest has never been won outright by a female.

Every Winner has either lived at that time in a county that starts with the letter “C” or originally hails from a county that starts with the letter “C”.

In 4 years 29 pumpkins have been carved

14% of those pumpkins were grown by Myself

The most entries ever was 9 in 2007

Fewest entries ever was 5 in 2008

Flip Cup Results:

OK, I apologize.  I don’t know what is wrong with me.  This was hands down my worst day of flip cup in I don’t know how many years.  I feel terrible for all of those people who I let down throughout the day.  I know why I sucked so bad in the first game (damn skinny cups, it’s like flipping a pencil for God’s sake).  But after that it was just a simple case of the Yips.  It was humbling.  It was also embarrassing seeing all of those new faces around the table who don’t realize how solid I usually am.  They all left with an impression that I was some schmuck, not the current win total leader.  I was however able to bring it together near the end of the day, in time enough to help lead J to his first ever win as a flip cup captain, and that’s probably for the best.  Had we lost that one, I have a sneaking suspicion that everyone on J’s team would have their brakes mysteriously fail on the ride home.  Luckily we’ll never know for sure. 

Saturday was indeed a big day for flip cup, by my count we had 6 series in all.  Some were your traditional games, but this Saturday saw the debut of the School Yard Draft showdown of J vs. Jen.  I don’t know if this will be a re-occurring feature, but I was glad to know that I wasn’t picked last, which I very well could have been on that day.  Thanks for taking a chance on savy vet down on his luck J.  I’m glad I didn’t let you down!

The First Series:  The first series of the day featured Team Torrential Rain vs. Team Strong Gusty Winds.  TR was made up of Deb, Mike, Bob, Megan, Vanessa, and Deb….again (good work notebook!).  Team SGW was made up of Jen, Emily, Colleen, Jason, Chris, and Jen (again I can’t make this up, I had two people recorded twice and this was only game 1!).  Anyway, just like the weather headlines for the day, Team Torrential Rain stormed to victory.  It got a little dicey when they were down 1-2, but TR took over from there winning the last 3 in a row to take the crown.

The Second Series:  Since these were basically the same teams, we’ll keep the same names.  This time TR was made up of Mike, Bob, Megan, Vanessa, Brian, and J.  SGW was made up of Jen, Chris, Justin, Jason, Emily, and Colleen.  This one wasn’t even close.  SGW won game 1, 2, 3, and 4 and left TR stunned.  As a loyal member of TR, I can’t even spin this one for God’s sakes.  All I say is that I probably played a pretty big role in the sweeping of my team, so for that guys, again, sorry.

The Third Series: The third game featured a classic showdown between the Poncho Villa’s and the Rain “City” Slickers.  PV’s were made up of Justin, Jen, Mike, Chris, and Emily, and the RCS were made up of Bob, Brian, Deb, J, and Megan.  This one was a bit more competitive and unlike the World Series actually went the distance.  PV’s came out strong winning the opener, but the RCS’s bounced back for game 2.  Games 3 and 4 were again swapped and that brought us to game 5.  This CRUCIAL game was taken by the RCS’s who thought they then had everything right where they wanted, but the PV’s for the first time in the series put two wins back to back and took the crown in 7. 

The Fourth Series:  The 4^th series featured two teams known as the “Noah’s Cast Off’s” and the “Titanic Engine Room’s Union”, hopefully you are picking up on the theme here.  NCO was made up of Chris, Justin, Jen, Emily, Colleen, and Jason.  The TERU’s were made up of Bob, Deb, J, Brian, Surin, and Megan.  NCO got off to a nice start winning game 1, but then TERU found it’s grove, if only temporarily.  After 3 games were in the book it was 2-1 TERU, but game 3 turned out to be their high water mark, as NCO rattled off 3 in a row to take the series.

And here is where it all changed.  Interestingly enough I spent all day on the south side of the table, and Emily spend most of the day on the north side.  When we came back from break Emily, who had done quiet well up to that point found herself without a team.  Being on the southside and realizing we needed to do something to shake things up, I quickly grabbed her and added her to our roster, using her rejection as a source of motivation for everyone (you see the little things like that are why my team has won 11 times).  That’s where the momentum shifted.

The Fifth Series: We’ll call this one the battle between “Hell Hath no Fury like an Emily Scorned” and the Flip Cup Snobs.   HHNFLAES was made up of Megan, Emily, J, Surin, Brian, Deb, and myself.  FCS was made up of Justin, Jen, Ann, Patty, Chris, Jason, and Colleen.  It wasn’t close, in fact it was a rout.  I think there may have been members of FCS who didn’t even drink the entire series.  HHNFLAES won in a sweep 4-0!!

The Sixth Series:  And here we are.  The game to end all games.  It is no secret that J and Jen are the most competitive flip cuppers in Lot 1, if not all of the East Coast.  J just missed out on last years title, and Jen wants to add her first as well.  So how do we make flip cup even more interesting??   We do a school yard pick.  Putting the two bull dogs as captains and letting things go from there.  J’s team was made up of J, B Lee, Justin, Emily, Brian, Deb, and Bob.  Jen’s team was made up of Surin, Jen, Shannon, Jason, Shelly, Patty, and Megan.  This was epic.  I personally had not been under such pressure since the 2008 Eight Men Out Baseball Fantasy League Bowling Night, but this was just as intense.  Of course J’s team started out slow dropping the first two, but things changed and Team J managed to win the next 3.  Of course right when we thought we had it all wrapped up, like some B-Movie Monster, Jen’s team came back to life to take game 6, and then came game 7.  This one went down to the end where J’s team just barely beat out Jen’s in a game that won’t soon be forgotten. 

Overall I’d call the School Yard Draft game a success.  Not sure if we’ll do it again, but we probably will.  So stay tuned, and if you don’t like being picked last, you’d better bring a note from your parents excusing you from recess for the day!

Flip Cup MVP of the Day was Emily.  The girl whose own team cut her loose.  What a mistake!   Who’s the GM over there Steve Phillips??

Uh oh, it’s getting a little cramped up here at the top.  Sure I have a 2 game lead over 2^nd place but I also have a new roommate in the 11^th Floor Suite.  As you can see, Justin and I share the same number of wins, but you can also see that his wins come with half as many losses as mine, so I’ll give him top bunk for now. 

Weather Report Card:

Boy what can I say, that was a botch to the highest degree.  Sorry guys.  Of course for as much abuse as I took I think the window of me feeling bad about the situation closed relatively quickly, in fact F all of you.  If you don’t like it go read the other D7 Weather Forecast, what’s that???  No one else has bothered writing one, well then!  Actually I take that back.  I’m really in no position to be isolating readers, all I can say is that I’ll do better.  After all it can’t get any worse, well maybe if I call for an August Snow Game or something ridiculous like that.

The “Save the Terrapin (tailgaters)” Drive:

We just about had a high dollar LRC game breakout, but as soon as we tried to throw it together a flip cup game started.  In fact I stood there for about 5 minutes torn between playing flip cup or trying to revive the LRC game.  As always Flip Cup ruled the day, but LRC will be back.  In the meantime we were able to raise 5$ this week.  And it wasn’t just any $5.  It was probably the most selfless act of generosity that has ever occurred in Lot 1.  Surin, on a dare from I think Chris, said that he would finish all the beer left over from Beer Pong in 5 minutes, for 5$.  He did it, and when Chris handed him the money, Surin held it up for all to see and said “This is for the D7 fund”.  What have you done for your tailgate lately?  Also don’t forget, even if we don’t play any money games, you can still donate to the cause.  I’m just saying…

Tailgate MVP:

This one was easy.  The Day belonged to J.  J had a lot going for him, but he probably won it when he dedicated the first hour of the tailgate to trying to fix my headlights.  The best part of all that was when he said that he might have a spare 1997 Dodge Dakota Headlight bulb in his truck.  Had that indeed happened, well then I guess I could have just handed him the 2008 Tailgater of the Year Award right there on the spot.  But that wasn’t it for J.  For not only did 2008 bring J a male heir, it also gave him his first ever, and long waited for, D7 Pumpkin Carving Championship.  If he had to choose one or the other, I’m guessing he’d pick his son for the highlight of the year, but I do think it’d take him a few moments to ponder the question.  Congratulations J!

Honorable Mention (in no particular order): 

Honorable Mention is also an easy choice this week.  The Honorable Mention goes to all of those people who took the time to do a pumpkin.  Believe me I know it isn’t easy and creating an entry into the D7 Pumpkin Contest is not something that you can just do at the last second…oh wait unless of course your name is Chris.  Anyway, Deb, Surin, Chris, Myself, and Brian Lee all get honorable mention.  No B-Lee’s pumpkin didn’t make an appearance, but he attempted one, and that in itself is worth mentioning. 

Also even though Surin is already an Honorable Mention he gets double secret HM for not only drinking the remaining beer for a D7 donation, but also for not bringing donuts.  Sometimes it’s the moves you don’t make that are the ones you are remembered for!

Conclusion

Well that wraps up the Homecoming Game.  How many more Homecomings have to go by until someone gets the idea to create a D7 Float?  Probably a lot since many of us have kids or will before too long, but how awesome would it be to one day have an entry of 8 people or so playing flip cup.  We could even make the arms and cups flip, if only we had someone with any engineering or float building experience, oh well. 

So until then, don’t forget:

• I owe J about 26 more jokes
• It goes Gandhi < Mother Teresa < Dali Lama < Surin
• Look for the D7 Flip Cup Homecoming Parade Float Coming in 2027!!
• If the D7 Desk calls for sun, you may want to bring a poncho

Next up Va Tech.  Don’t worry if you aren’t going, check out the D7 Website for the first ever updated road trip in our history.  Sure hearing an hourly exploit of Bob, Brian, and Chris on the road may not be that exciting, but then again, it’s better than actually doing work on Thursday!